Untitled

There's a continuation
between my moon and heart
and my brain and the sun
with each sinking, there's a rise in the other
but can never be present at the same time
except for special occasions however
my body doesn't work that way
no matter how practical I want to be
there is always my heart
it never follows
and it's slowly diminishing
but with my brain sinking
it's shackles are lost and it beats
with more breathe
more exertion
because it doesn't want to believe
that it will be locked again
and it runs
it runs away from reality
from everything around
and no longer follows it's normal pattern
but it's own pattern
and it's lost and it loves that feeling
because it's no longer hurting, or caring for anyone else
but for itself.

Untitled

Once, if there ever was a love that was found
then it was lost in the same time of it's discover
But the pain lingers for about a hundred times that length
And with that knife it allows all my contents
To splatter on the wall, with it's twisted contents
Of myocardium, pericardium and endocardium
composed of myosin, actin, and connective tissue
and then digging deeper, it's too late
because the blood is pumping and it's fatal
and all I can do is watch as my own blood
is falling unto my fingers as it drips
and it drips with hurt
and it drips with pain
and I indulge myself with every sensation
because it's better then the pain of heartbreak
It's better than the pain of ignorance
That burning, stabbing pain
It's better than that
It's a deep deep mark
to the deep deep spark
that was once lit and now will eventually be gone
and all that is there is fibrous tissue at about 2 months

Gone

And like that, she was gone
flashed before your eyes
and vanished
from within
your heart is breaking

Untitled

Slowly, my day is sinking
Beyond the hurt and the hell
I am still not afloat
And I am weeping
and flooding in the tears
Confused and perplexed
I seek some sort of guidance
be it from anyone
but I can't find it
because I am lost, in true loosing
it is my calmness.

Untitled

I was secretly planning a death
A death surmountable to life
That is was maybe disconnected for the rest of the earth
A tribute to my life and the unwilling truth of everything
To let me have my way
Because I'm in a delightful careless sadness
A depressed state of hating, angry, and lonely
Because no one will know
No one will know
Because of the caring

Untitled

I miss
my day
my light
my star
my night
where have they gone
I'm not sure you see
because fate will take him away from me
he's left a mark
so dear to my heart
I can never forget
I can never regret
my love and his love
both intertwined
and will diverge
it's our destiny
unless we are bold
but others will then be mutilated

Untitled

When I am constantly looking up
It means that I am in wonder
Of the world and it's sky
When I am constantly looking down
It means that I am in awe
Of the world and it's earth
When I am constantly looking beneath
It means that I am in pleasure
Of the world and it's water
Because they continue to surprise me
Am am no longer thinking about myself
But at God's wonder and am thankful
That I could be placed here
With people, with everyone
Because I could never have it any other way
I am who I am
No one can change me

Untitled

When i woke up that day
I knew I loved you
and I saw myself losing you
and I didn't want to
I slept there patiently
experiencing your gentle touch
and knew that I was going to lose you
I have dug my hole deeper and I can say
my life is nothing without you
but I do have you
in spirit
and I hope we meet in another life
maybe in heaven
where soul mates can join each other
without worry
or fear
because there is nothing to worry about
but being happy
our spirit is intertwined
you and I
from the first day you held my hand
I knew
that you were mine and I was yours
and that I was going to lose you

Your note

I sent you a note
and then unfolded love
and with that love
there was a kiss
and it never reached you
because it blocked
by nothing
and everything
these things that are a part of our day
but mean nothing to us
and it blocked us both
from getting anything done
between us
because we're back to the beginning
the beginning of when we first kissed
and still learning about each other
because I don't know who you are anymore
and I don't know
because you don't know about me
because we just don't talk
or speak
or dare to cross
that boundary
it's so fragile
and week
and we too
will always be teetering
because that's the will
that's the way
it shall be

Untitled

When I fall,
I fall in love with you
Because you were there with me
at the bottom
of emptiness
and we filled each other up
with our secrets
desires
passions
However our cup is leaking
slowly leaking

Its

how it shines, looks so happy
how it has forgotten all of its worries
It doesn't remember anything or anyone
It makes me question my reality
It says "It is happy" now
while It leid to me the whole time
It is a shape shifter
It has two tongues
It doesn't remember its own words
It is just a ........

Sat 5/15/2010 3:42 PM

one kiss from you makes my knees go weak
each time you touch me, my heart races for you
each time we talk my heart becomes in sync with your
each time i see you i want to make love to you

Thu 5/13/2010 9:14 PM
Be as it may
whether sandy beaches or withering cold
my hand will stay in your hand
my eyes will see in the night
to be a your side Hey dark Madam
the night becomes long beautiful and enjoyable
the life becomes a paradise
hey my love,
your beauty is unmatched
truly i have missed your eyes
oh you music lets play ur self for me
lets enjoy each other and get lost in each other

fondness

Thu 5/13/2010 7:17 PM
Quite fond you are of me says you
Complete change withheld, now open
For last we talked, I'm still with you
But how are you with coping?
For neither I nor you know what's to behold
Bright sandy beach, or withering cold.
Either way, we once, we once
And are, too bold
Too bold, and not stopping.
Living Organized: Proven Steps for a Clutter-Free and Beautiful Home

dream

Thu 5/13/2010 6:10 PM
i was a dream, a wind
then u came
made me a reality
made me close to ground
i belonged with
rather than a brisk wind that always keeps moving
oh how amazing this change
in my heart and my mind it always will be like this
u r my reality ur my.....

THE SUN

Constant struggle between the moon and earth
each desires the only sun
each recieves something special
the moon becomes bright
the earth becomes alive
a huge responsibility the earth must bear
how both the earth and moon depend on its rays
otherwise the moon will hide its face away
the earth will die and give away
the sun will be all alone again
you are the sun who has it bad

Liars

what are memories,
something wonderful,
something dear,
something sweet,
something to cherish,
what if all those were made with lies,
then they become horrors,
something that will haunt you,
something that actually wasn't there to begin with
it was just a mirage
you realize they weren't memories
just a bad dream
but its not a total loss
only for the one who live there lives with lies, telling themselves that it is ok, as long as they can live with themselves.
these people only care about themselves
they have no regard for anyone
they don't understand the meaning of love, family, care
they only live in the world that have created for themselves only
there lies are so obvious yet they act oblivious to it

Only one

One day my dream would be a reality or my reality would become my dream, the line would become gray or clear, my mind will sail on an open ocean
sing the song of crashing waves become one with one that I desire on an open sea

Perineum

Sit I sit,
Wait I wait,
zoning out, hear campers fascia, fat, scrotal penis, dartos fascia, deep membranous layer,
zoning in- all important rupture of deep dorsal artery bleeds into the superficial pouch
she drinks and wobble, pea size sarcasm